The Kind Truth
Healthy Disagreement
Productive Argument
The aforementioned phrases are shorthand for coming up with the best ideas. They are not born of assent or consensus. The best ideas are ones that have multiple points of view to broaden our thinking and perspective. They are often born out of discomfort.
I found this HBR article useful to support this idea. There are several tools provided to help you navigate what can be an uncomfortable process for many.
Another tool I have come across is something Dan and Chip Heath call “action triggers”. The essence of this is to practice ahead of time how you will handle a disagreement. You can do this as a role play or simply by thinking it through.
For instance, you can practice curiosity by reminding yourself to first ask questions about how someone came to that point of view or to give you some specific examples of where that has worked for them. By priming your brain to react in a certain way, you are more likely to limit your emotional response (aka amygdala hijack) and engage the critical thinking areas of your brain.
More on action triggers here.
I heard Reed Hastings once say “Silent disagreement is disloyal.” I believe it is the job of the leader to not only encourage disagreement but create it when necessary. No plan is foolproof.
If no one disagrees, adjourn the meeting until someone has the good sense to. More on disagreement here on a previous post on how to think like a rocket scientist.